Supporting LGBTQIA+ Clients in Counseling

If the rainbow flags and logos didn’t give you a clue, June is pride month. The Stonewall Riots occurred in June and led to many (shockingly recent) changes in law to provide rights to the LGBTQIA+ community.  But the recent rollback of rights and protections for the transgender community has proven we’ve got a long way to go still—which is why it’s so important to make your support of the LGBTQIA+ community visible as a counselor.

Yes, I’m speaking to my fellow counselors today. That doesn’t mean that this article isn’t for non-counselors either. I’ll be sharing what I think an affirming and supportive therapist can do to show LGBTQIA+ support which may help you find someone with these qualities to work with.

Mental health agencies and allies seem to keep silent on issues that are areas of great debate—despite the fact human rights should never be a debate. Support of the LGBTQIA+ community is something that I see lacking greatly in mental health. Individual counselors and social workers are out here showing support but it’s difficult to see if the agencies we work under don’t send out that message.

 

Whether an individual clinician or a whole agency, here are some thoughts on showing your support and acceptance, and why it’s important:

 

Representation Matters

Before I got my first job as a counselor, I’d already had my Safe Spaces training (focused on being an LGBTQIA+ ally) completed and had my rainbow sticker ready to go. When I got into my office, I made sure to buy something I could put it on for display. It’s only a few inches tall and wide, but when you’re looking for signs of safety and acceptance, it’s huge.

I say this as both an ally and a pansexual member of the community. For myself, I always judge an establishment on its bathroom signs. If there are individual occupant bathrooms, there’s nothing holding a company back from using a non-gendered sign (rather than two separate gendered signs) that costs as little as six dollars. It’s a small gesture, but it means a lot when people are being harassed about which bathroom they are allowed to use.

These signs are subtle. Nonetheless, in mental health, I believe they are crucial. An LGBTQIA+ person runs the risk of being hurt (maybe for the hundredth or thousandth time) by someone they were supposed to be able to trust if that person isn’t affirming. It can result in holding back about gender identity, sexual or affectional orientation, or questioning thoughts.

Providing representation is a simple way of saying, “I’m safe, so you’re safe.”

 

Be Affirming

While the acceptance and support of the LGBTQIA+ community is large and widespread—I like to believe there are many more of us than there are of the people who choose hate—some people still have barriers around them. Unaffirming family members, religious institutions, friends, workplaces, schools, extracurricular groups, and more are present in the lives of LGBTQIA+ people everywhere.

Not all of us are lucky enough to have a strong support system of affirming loved ones. Not all of us are lucky enough to have had people not only accept us but also believe there’s nothing wrong with us. Not all of us can find basic human kindness and decency in our daily lives.

A counselor has the opportunity to provide true affirmation, acceptance, and support to those who have not seen it before or who have seen it come with conditions (“I love you but I don’t love what you do”). A counselor can also help to break down the conditions, most commonly, by religious teachings. Being an active, knowledgeable ally makes this possible.

 

Be Educated

As a counselor, you might be the person a client chooses to come out to so you want to be ready not to do harm. Whenever you’re an ally, it’s not enough to say, “I’m accepting.” (Although that can be a good start!) You need to educate yourself regularly so that you don’t cause harm inadvertently due to lack of knowledge.

There’s a lot of outdated language out there that people still use and shouldn’t such as the word “homosexual.” That word was used in mental health treatment at one time as a classified disorder across multiple diagnostic platforms. Of course, being gay or lesbian is not a mental illness, so classifying it as such was stigmatizing. Over time, the word has become obsolete because of the stigma that mental health put on it as recently as the 1990’s.

 

Remove Bias

If you hold biases against the LGBTQIA+, you know that it’s harmful, you know that it’s unethical, and, thus, you shouldn’t be a counselor. Period. Sorry, not sorry. Get rid of this bias (as much as you should be getting rid of racism, ableism, sexism…and so on) or get out of the field.