Managing Mental Health During the COVID-19 Crisis

The world is in a panic and normal daily life is coming to a halt. The reality is that COVID-19 has become a fast-acting public health crisis. Because its impact varies from person to person, governments around the world are taking action in an attempt to slow the spread of the virus and, hopefully, get ahead of it.

Reactions from the general public have ranged from panicked to annoyed and everywhere in between. Whether you’re worried about the outcome of the virus spreading or irritated that life as we know it has been effectively put on pause, you’ll need to pay attention to your mental health during this stressful time.

 

Here are some tips for managing your mental health during the COVID-19 health crisis:

Let Go of What You Can’t Control and Focus on What You Can

The virus is here and you cannot control that. Events have and will be cancelled, school put on hold, daily life paused and so on. This, too, is not within your control. Also not within your control; how others react to the virus, how the media covers it, what your employer mandates for safety (if anything), the shortage of toilet paper and masks, inflated prices from online retailers on hand sanitizer…and it goes on. You get the idea.

You cannot directly control any of the external factors, it’s true, but that’s no different from anything else in life. What you can focus on is what is in your control, which usually relates to your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Look at what you might be worried about and ask yourself, “is there anything I can do about this?”

Can you do anything about the virus? Not in the sense of stopping it from happening, no. You can, however, control your behavior in reaction to the spread of it as has been advised from health agencies. Wash your hands, keep distance from others in public, don’t go out unless necessary, avoid large gatherings, don’t touch your face, check the CDC website and talk with local health departments for strategies and tips, and remind yourself that you’re taking the precautions so that you’re in the most control possible.

 Be Open to Flexibility

I know not everyone will have access to the internet and that is certainly a barrier. However, if you do have access to the internet from home, be open to the idea of working from home, school from home, and even therapy from home. A great many schools have closed, workplaces are trying to implement working from home, and therapy offices—at least where I am—are considering telehealth (usually vido chat therapy) now more than ever. I mention this particularly with a focus on being able to continue therapy even when businesses and agencies are shut down to the public.

 Fight the Boredom

Events being cancelled, gatherings being shut down, and daily operations coming to a halt is going to start (if it hasn’t already) making people feel antsy about the lack of interaction and getting out of the house. As grim as this situation may be, there’s still room to press forward and keep spirits high. Do so by trying out some new hobbies or re-connecting with old ones.

These hobbies are ideally indoor and likely less social—don’t get me wrong, with the internet we still have a lot of social options. Start drawing, pick up a good book, get into a video game, start a home workout regimen, gather the immediate family in the home for board games, start/finish those craft projects, build that whatever you’ve been meaning to get back to. This is also a way of performing self-care to help you stay resilient in a tough time.

I don’t want to make light of this situation or diminish the seriousness in anyway. But life will move forward and we have to be able to keep going. Taking care of our mental needs will help us to push forward and past the struggles.

Most of all, I wish for everyone to stay safe and take care of themselves. I’m saddened by the loss our world has suffered already and I hope that this is nearing an end. My thoughts are with those who have a lot of unknowns heading their way related not only to the virus, but to jobs, childcare, food, bills…and anything else thrown into question at this time. I feel helpless at this time and the only thing I can do with the resources I have is post this article to hopefully give someone a little direction or peace of mind.

Stay well.

The World Isn’t Fair but We Expect It to Be

…And That’s a Problem

Most of us recognize on some level that the world is not fair. There are many of these types of divides in the world that are based on circumstance alone. On a large scale, that’s far enough removed that it make sense.

On a smaller scale, the individual scale, we sometimes like to believe we control more than just ourselves.  That’s where this gets tricky. A common fallacy create in the mind is that if we something out into the universe, we will get that back from the universe.

Known by names such as the “just-world fallacy” or “just-world theory,” this phenomenon leads people to expect that the world is a just one. Born of this mindset are the old adages; “you reap what you sew” or; “what goes around comes around.” It’s often used to explain victim-blaming, which I won’t tread far into in this article.

The concept of a just-world goes further than victim-blaming, it is so deeply rooted in human beliefs. I need only look to myself for an example. Even as I regularly describe this cognitive bias to client after client, I still struggle with it—not in victim-blaming but in many other ways, for sure. It’s hard not to cling to this idealistic bias of how the world works. Here’s why:

 It’s Rooted in Many Belief Systems

In beliefs from Christianity to Paganism, the idea of a just-world plays a role in many ways. I’ll speak to what I know and say that in Christianity the meek shall inherit the Earth. This is the ultimate prize for being a good person and following the path the religion sets out and it’s also the ultimate punishment for those who don’t do good. Paganism is wide, but I know in my experience many of these old faiths believe everything operates on a three-fold rule. If you put out good energy the universe sends it back times three, if you put out bad that is what you receive back three-fold. These are just two examples.

These beliefs, I’ll venture to say, are trying to remind you to be the decent, caring, genuine person you strive to be. But what happens when someone who feels they keep doing good, keeps getting bad in return? They have a few choices; a) accept that bad things happen to good people; b) question whether or not they’ve done bad and are being punished; or c) become angry they didn’t get a reward for the good they do.

Option “c” my sound silly to read but in real life, I hear it a lot. Others run around being awful and there’s been no lighting striking them, they’re even doing great in life, so what’s the point of being “good?” The trouble with this reaction is that it suggests we are trying to be a certain way to get a reward and avoid punishment rather than be that way because we want to. I like to think religions/beliefs systems want us to be—at their core, not by someone’s skewed interpretations—the kind of people who have dignity, treat others and our own selves well, and strive to be better each day. The only reward you should be expecting for that would be the self-satisfaction it can bring.

It Makes Us Feel Safe

This is where victim-blaming usually shines. If you are doing everything right you will be safe, but if you’re not, you won’t be. People use this logic to say women are raped because of what they wear and people’s houses are robbed because they didn’t lock their doors.

I think this goes beyond just victim-shaming, to even shaming people for being poor, having illnesses, being overweight and more. More often now people are shaming the bodies of overweight individuals, usually women, who are body-positive role models. These people are using the just-world fallacy as a way to feel safe from becoming overweight.

If they buckle down and assure themselves that all people who are overweight are just inactive and eat too much or all the wrong foods, they can safety tell themselves, “as long as I eat right and exercise, I’ll stay a normal weight.” If they, instead, accept that there are people out there who are highly active and have normal diets and are still overweight due to genetics or illness, they have to accept that they could one day find themselves out of control of their bodies.

Using this mentality, people can explain away anything that doesn’t make them feel safe.

It Reduces Ambiguity

People often ask “why” when terrible illness or tragedy strikes. Many find the answer to that in the just-world fallacy. "She got cancer because of how badly she treated her ex-husband." "He got into an accident because of money laundering." It can even be turned inward; “I have depression because I’m so unlikable.”

Many things happen that we don’t really have answers for “why.” That doesn’t mean we can’t come up with an answer. If we assume some type of cosmic force of justice must be the reason others and ourselves our struck with misfortune we have an answer. It’s a lame answer but it is an answer, after all.

Here’s the Reality

Being a “good person” and doing the “right thing” does have benefits. Just not quite in the way this thought-process assumes. People do receive psychological benefits from altruism and kindness which is why many people enjoy paying for other people’s food in the drive through and volunteering with habitat for humanity. 

Bottom line? Be the kind of person you feel good about being for the purpose of being just that. You’re not any safer by rationalizing someone else’s struggles or misfortune. Ambiguity is a part of life and the best way to deal with not having an answer is acceptance.